My personal journey as a mother of a child on the spectrum, now a practicing behavior analyst in the field of ABA.

My son was diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder at the age of two and a half years. The driving force that led me to seek out help that ultimately led to diagnosis was asking questions. It took some introspection and really looking around at other children. I ultimately reached out to my pediatrician to seek support, and was provided with a standardized assessment for developmental stages. I remember sitting in my car scanning the checklist and realizing that almost everything on the questionnaire, he could not do at that time. It was right then that I began to see that my instincts were correct and that I was not imagining the struggles and apparent delays.

When my son first received the diagnosis of ASD, I had mixed emotions ranging from relief to fear. It was relieving in the sense that I finally felt like there was an answer to the struggles I was having as a mother, raising my son. My son was showing signs of communication delay and was aggressing toward his father and me, and it seemed like everything we were trying just wasn’t working. The fear came next, mainly because it was the fear of the unknown and a lot of my limited view of autism was not positive at the time.

If I could go back in time to when we first received the diagnosis, I would have loved someone with experience with autism to tell me that it was going to be okay. It would have been beneficial to know that I wasn’t going to be alone in what was to come, and that there were many resources available once you receive the diagnosis. These resources are there to be utilized and are there to provide you with support and education. I did not have personal connections to those that had experience with autism, so I really leaned on the support system I had at the time. There were advantages and disadvantages to that – advantages in the sense that the group I was leaning on were also mothers of young children and disadvantages because their children were neurotypical and not exhibiting any delays.

I have also learned through my journey of motherhood that seeking out support for yourself while navigating receiving a diagnosis or parenting a child of special needs, is equally important. It is challenging to show up for your child if you have not found a support system for you. This can look like reaching out to local support groups or even seeking out one-on-one therapy for yourself. It’s important to not only show up at the “parent,” but also to show up as an individual. This has ultimately helped me support my son in the best way I can.

Once my family and I received support, I was inspired by the attention and care that my child was provided through our ABA service provider. It was the progress and support that we received that ultimately led me to seek out my own career in the field of ABA. I began working in the field shortly after my son started receiving services, went back to school to pursue my Master of Science in ABA and becoming a Board Certified Behavior Analyst. My personal experience with ABA from the parent perspective allows me to connect with the families that I work with paired with my experience and education in behavior analysis. I find that this pairing has allowed me to develop more meaningful relationships with my families and offer them a different level of support and understanding. It gives me the perspective of the family knowing the steps that they have gone through to get to ABA, and that oftentimes the mental load of getting to ABA services is quite heavy.

I am often asked about how to discuss the autism diagnosis with individuals from the parent’s perspective because of my son. Ultimately the decision is up to the parent and how they choose to navigate that conversation with their child. In my own household, we have never had the topic of autism off the table. It is a part of our lives and a part of who we are as a family. My son knows that I work with individuals on the autism spectrum and he has always been aware of his diagnosis, as we talk about it openly. We did not choose to approach it as a “sit down topic,” but naturally incorporated into our household. Though my son is on the autism spectrum, it does not define who he is. He is simply, himself. He understands that autism is a spectrum and that it can look different amongst individuals. We encourage learning and curiosity around autism, and try our best to actively be involved in his current or recurring special interests.

I am hopeful for the future of my clients and am continued to be inspired by the parents I work with and meet. I continued to be inspired by how fiercely some parents will fight and advocate for their children. I consistently meet those in the field of ABA that are showing up to work every day with the intention to make a difference and to truly help others. With that mentality, I have seen such a shift in the willingness to be open and accept feedback as our field continues to grow.